ASDFGHJK!!!

STOP BEING A CONTROL FREAK AND LET ME LIVE MY LIFE ON MY OWN!!!!
Sometimes the best thing you can do is to just shut up and ignore...pokerface.

You've ruined my GOOD! day twice in a row...thank you so much for that...
It's actually quite a wonder that you don't get the hint at all...just leave me and my business alone!!


It's funny that I was just telling others that I have chosen to let you go to the camp on your own to give you space. Now I think I need the space more than you!.  Just be a good sister and stop trying to force your way into my life...stop trying to force me to do things your way.  Be a good sister and let me grow up myself.  v




I was telling a friend that you and I clash well...now you seem to be the trigger for it all...


Give me a soundproof room and I'll make sure you hear me on the other side...it's not like I have enough nonsense on my plate already!

Sometimes al you need is:

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Updates

"We are a bunch of random people that make up the world, it's still a journey finding where I can fit in."

I actually thought of stopping this blog for 14 weeks..but then it hit me that...THIS IS MY PERSONAL BLOG.

If I don't update this, I'm actually killing PERSONAL time and replacing it with work.  Well, so I shan't stop, but I won't update as regularly as before la...

So my life has been getting worryingly indescribable.  Over the long break, I've lost touch with a lot of people and actually at life itself...it felt awkward going back to class and saying HI to everybody all over again - after all we knew each other already.  

Another reason why I feel weird is the fact that 8 months has already passed.  EIGHT MONTHS! It moved so fast! I can't believe that I've been friends with the psychos for already so long. I'm really glad that we are getting tight and close...much much faster than I expected. 

Things seem to be picking up...I'm not that socially awkward kid anymore :) 

Well...not as I used to be at least...

Still need to find meself an AP...but I think the best decision is not to look for one, because God would give me one if I need one..I guess

HEHE...so many things are happening! So forgive the random blurting of things :P

Silence

For the next 14weeks, I'm not gonna update much. Most of my updates will be found here: http://pioneerinspired.blogspot.com/ :)

Support me! :)

Why the fear?

Today I've realized the reason for my fear in...everything.
I always thought my pessimism was due to the introverted melancholic in me but now I know it's not the ONLY reason. Sure my temperament will play an important role in my thinking, but it does not explain why I'm always seeing the worse in situations.

I'm pretty sure that if I am to direct a horror movie, it'll be one super scary one...that's why I don't watch horror movies, the thought's of death is such a scary concept.

My fear can be traced down to my earliest memory. I mean some people remember the park they grew up in, the toy that they loved, the cot they slept in while their parents sang lullabies, but not me. You want to know my earliest ever memories are? They are of me almost drowning...I admit, not a really encouraging one. But could my fear of things have begun from here?

I'm thankful that my next semester is going to have one class that has compulsory counselling. Hopefully I can get everything out and STOP being so pessimistic about things. I need to start seeing the good in both situations and people. I want to...

I want to see the possibility of us being together without thinking of how much better you are without me. I want to see the end of the day without thinking that I may not wake up the next day. I want to jump and climb things without thinking of the mess I'd make if I fell. I want to drive the car without...yea, I should not continue to the further reaches of my "dark" thoughts, so I should stop here...

Yes, at least now I know that my past had an effect on my present...Freud was right after all. =/

The distance is revealing itself

I wonder why I don't feel the same towards you now...is it the distance?

Yea, we've been apart for some time, but I thought feelings grow stronger over time? Heh, I guess that's a lie...maybe when I see you again, but for now, I have to think about whether this is real...

Sure I have the backing of some people, but then it's between two of us...
Comparing you with the others that I've like and seeing whether the feeling for you is more, but I don't know...
I guess when I see you again, I'll realize whether I've missed you or not.

EH, emo post...

Brain-fried

Trying my best to try to understand the non-understandable is getting pretty hard...
I mean, spending 30 minutes on two pages and still not comprehending much is really something new to me...
Well, it's a challenge to learn something new...to be able to communicate better with people, to be able to share and show how the Person I believe in is real no matter what secular science says...that's my personal challenge.
Sure, I may never have all the answer to every argument, but at least I need to know a way to answer.

The thing I'm most assured off is that there's no point defending my faith, because if I really believe in what I believe in, it can defend itself...I'm not defending God's image, I'm defending the Christian image...that's my job as a Christian - to be one.

Like the Casting Crowns song, The Word is Alive, says, "The world doesn't need my tie, my hoodie, or my denomination...we can't strap ourselves to the Gospel, 'cause all we're doing is slowing it down." What we can do is to live up to the Christian perspective and "Love them like Jesus' (another Casting Crowns song) :)



HAHA...the conclusion seems totally different from the title...oh wells :)