No One Cared

No one cared

Act 1

They pass me by,

Oblivious to my pain.

They just walk away from me

As if I was insane.

No one cares

Life isn’t fair

I would end my life, if I only dare.

Along the corridor

I hear sounds of joy.

Laughter and teasing

From every girl and boy.

Do they notice me when I sit beside them?

Can they see the pain in my eyes?

Can they hear my pleads for endearment?

Do they even hear my cries?

Act 2

At home is no different

Just a different change of scene

My parents don’t care of what I’ve done

Or the places I have been.

They just spend their time

Fighting with each other.

How I wish I could have

A more caring father and mother.

No one cares

Life isn’t fair

I would end my life, if I only dare.

Act 3

I then decided that life was not worth my time

Not worth a single cent or dime.

I head to my room and planned for my doom.

I thought of many ways to end it all…

About drug overdoses and balcony falls.

The one decision to finish my life

The one decision that can end my strife

With just one move, there’ll be no more pain

Just one action can be my bane.

Into the toilet, in search for a blade,

It was all set, my plans were made.

Because, when I compared to others,

On where my life fared,

I realized only one thing—

No one cared.

-END

-ReubeN- 

No, don't worry this is not my suicide note or anything.  This poem is written to bring awareness to the people that walk among us with pain behind their eyes.  This is dedicated to the hurt, to the angry, and to the crying.  This poem is meant to illustrate only the surface of their suffering.

So whenever you see that kid, that you've never talked to, or that guy that always sits alone, be a friend to them without any.  Even a smile could save a life.  You never know, you could be the hero that saved them from danger. =)

Oh Stats!

I don't know why, but maths always has its way of making me stressed...
From calculus, to finite maths, and now, statistics...

The coolest thing about stats is that we have assignments that it tells you nothing about what you are supposed to do -_____-"
And the worst part is that it gives you homework with a 6 hour deadline -___________________-"



Well...I guess I need to love what I hate in order to do well :)

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Yeah...I kinda blogged....

Blog Gap

There's gonna be a great big gap in this blog...


Not because nothing is happening, but because I just don't feel like blogging anymore...


It's my life and I think spreading through the word of mouth is much better...so wanna know how my day has been?? Ask me =)

You know what?

It's been two whole days since I last came online -___-


Can I sue Digi for not saying that 'with Digi broadband, I will disconnect only when I want it to'?

It's a lie, I tell you, a LIE!!!!

Well, Digi has been kinda good, but at random times it gives way.


Should I put two whole days of a blogpost here???
I rather not...my hands might just fall off =P

Taking Comfort?

"I'm movin' on..." -Rascal Flatts

Rascal Flatts seem to find their way on my blog very often, but this song means so much more to me now.  I'm in a state where I'm feeling rather angry.  Angry at some people in authority that just REFUSE to change.  This group of people are leaders of the status quo.  I mean, what makes you guys think that what worked twenty years ago works now? You guys should be caring more at building the people than for the building.

After five years, I've only been getting more and more disappointed.  I'm most disappointed at the fact that they have become to comfortable.  Just like Sardis.

Brief history on Sardis:

Sardis was a city in the Roman empire that was completely impenetrable.  It was walled on three sides and had a mountain behind it.  Because of its 'impenetrability', the people or Sardis became proud.  They took comfort in their defense and were invaded twice...the same way.

I feel that we are too comfortable--we lack prosecution--we lack fire.  We are content in living in this 'safe' environment we have created for ourselves.  

They say that we have to try to change to status quo, but I have tried...and the more I try, the more I feel like I'm flogging a dead horse.  

I think/hope I only need a break.  I won't know whether this will be only a break or a permanent change.  I hope things can change so I won't have to change...

The problem with college is that sometimes it opens your eyes to the things you were once blind to--it opened my eyes to the world and sin...it opened my eyes to the imperfectness in our world, and I hate it =(

I hate that we are so comfortable...

Hmmm...

I liked the time we spent that day just talking about the world...

Hope we can more of those =)

--------------------------------------------

Results out tomorrow...so gan jiong now O_O

Still hoping to find that one friend to be able to fall back on...

The Drifter

It just occurred to me that I have very little friends I can rely on =/

Well, I can blame this on my introvertedness, my age, and my homeschooling, but in the end it is my fault that I don't have the friends that can support me.  It's funny that I have 246 Facebook friends and yet I don't think I can call on most of them for support.  I know it's not their fault--it's mine--this has to do with my drifter attitude.

I don't want to be left out so much and ignored that I drift from group to group so that I can be accepted everywhere.  I am afraid of intoxicating them with my presence so I disappear before they can get irritated with me.

I have no idea where I got this attitude from.  It's this USELESS fear of rejection that IS getting me rejected all the time!!

I hate being the drifter, yet I like being able to fit everywhere.  I hate being rejected, yet I can't live without friendship.  I seriously hate this symbiotic equation for failure.

It's like I'm a mosquito and I know it...I latch on to people, and I fear that they have bug spray, so I fly away and suck blood from different groups all the times, hoping that they won't spray me...

Okay , I know it's a lousy analogy, but the point is clear.

I don't make friends often, and I seem to be able to loose them more easily...
And I can't live without them...sigh


I think that's more than enough for the world to know...the rest will be said only between me and myself =/